Mother's Day isn't just about honoring mom. It's also about the ...

As Laura Martin-Spencer enjoys breakfast in bed, cuddling with her four children on Mother’s Day, she will treasure motherhood — and relish the recognition an official holiday provides.

Like other busy mothers, she appreciates when family members take the time to thank and acknowledge her efforts as a wife, matriarch and breadwinner.

“We are so busy in our day-to-day lives as mothers,” says Martin-Spencer, pastoral associate at The Immaculata Church at the University of San Diego and director of pastoral formation for the Diocese of San Diego’s seminarians.

“Mothers play an important but often silent role in keeping the household going,” she adds, “so to slow down and take a day to say, ‘this is work is important,’ is very meaningful.”

Sometimes, she says, her husband will present her with a Mother’s Day card featuring a handwritten list of all the little tasks he’s noticed her handling behind the scenes for him and their children, who range from ages 7 to 18.

“It’s validating and energizing to see what we do matters,” she said.

Not only do mothers matter in keeping everyone on track, but they also play pivotal roles in nurturing their children’s faith lives, Martin-Spencer said.

“A Notre Dame study said parents are the No. 1 influence on their children’s faith,” says Martin-Spencer. “In a household that communicates faith, it’s important that both parents are involved in a home filled with books on faith or the saints — and mothers especially are good at this type of communication.”

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Like many others, Co-Pastor Laurel Mathewson of St. Luke’s Episcopal Church in North Park finds Mother’s Day to be a bittersweet holiday. At just 21 years old, she lost her mother to cancer. Since then, Mathewson admits, “It’s not a simple day in terms of emotions and experience.”

“Mothers are one of the most profound and deeply affecting relationships of our lives,” she adds, “so Mother’s Day can be complicated.”

At the same time, she says, embracing and celebrating mothers as a church community is healing and joyful.

In her sermon this Mother’s Day, she wants to go beyond earthly motherhood’s biological realities and describe God’s mothering characteristics. “I want to make that theological connection to help people broaden their reflection on what it means to be mothered by God.

“And as a mother, I want to reflect on the love of God in my own life.”

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Due to the recent passing of his beloved mother-in-law, this year’s celebration will be difficult for Bill Trok and his family.

“Mother’s Day is difficult for many people,” observes Trok, lead pastor of Ridgeview Church in Valley Center. “People dealing with infertility, those who’ve lost a child, or others who’ve lost their mothers through death or estrangement — these experiences can provoke internal conflict in our hearts and minds.”

At the same time, he says, Mother’s Day reminds us to reach out to our mothers while they are with us — and to recognize their value.

“I’ve thought a lot about mothers through the years,” he said. “And I believe it’s not just one thing to be a mom, but many things. Someone once said that motherhood is difficult, exhausting, powerful, magnificent and ordinary all at the same time.”

Like Mathewson, Trok said his sermon will reflect on the Judeo-Christian understanding of who God is, and the idea that God finds expression in both male and female characteristics. “He is caring, concerned, and tender, and he is also strong, setting boundaries for our well-being.”

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Mothers minister to their families in ways fathers do not, agrees Pastor David D. Cajiuat of San Diego’s Anchor Baptist Church.

“Men tend to be no-nonsense,” Cajiuat says. “The other necessities for children are compassion and intimacy, which are the greatest gifts children have in mothers. I certainly see this in what my wife does.”

In his Mother’s Day sermon this year, he wants to emphasize the great need of children for their parents to invest time and energy in family life. “Investing time in the kids is vital for their upbringing,” he notes. “Kids are looking for that. We have young moms today who are so into social media, so much with the TikTok thing that the children are neglected.

“So many times electronic devices put distance between mother and child,” he adds. “The great need children have is for our time as parents. Time shows love.”

He cites Hannah in the Old Testament, who prayed for Samuel and was so committed to God that she promised to give Samuel to the Lord. “She was a woman of prayer and principle and a great role model for moms.”

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A mother’s leadership, actions and values profoundly impact the whole family, extending to areas of spirituality and faith, Mathewson believes. “I can see as a pastor how the faith of a mother has profound reverberations within the household, some that are even nonverbal,” she notes.

Raising faith-filled children depends largely on a mother’s ministry, Trok says. While fathers guide children with strong, decisive love that is action-oriented, mothers’ tenderness is vital to influencing their faith.

Mary, the mother of Jesus, is a role model for many mothers, Martin-Spencer says, and a wellspring of reassurance for busy moms. She said a recent experience in a prayer labyrinth in the Holy Land confirmed that for her.

“I felt her presence,” Martin-Spencer said. “And I heard her say to me, ‘Let me mother you.’ It meant the world to me to begin the pilgrimage that way.”

Mathewson cites a popular litany that names at least a dozen biblical women who experienced different aspects of motherhood, including women who lost children of many ages: Naomi, who took on a mothering role to a young woman later in life, and Rachel, who wept for her children.

“There are so many different, complicated images of motherhood in Scripture,” Mathewson says. “The litany points to important stories of faith that remind us that mothers come in many varieties worldwide.”

Douglas is a freelance writer.