As Stanley Cup playoffs start, we rank the NHL's best and worst goal ...

The Stanley Cup playoffs arrive with a local earworm alert: Should the Maple Leafs offense gather some mojo in Toronto, the collective head space of Lightning fans will be haunted by Hall & Oates.

Per its peculiar tradition, every Toronto goal scored inside Scotiabank Arena will be celebrated with the first several bars of the duo’s 1981 top-five ditty, You Make My Dreams (Come True). The song slithered its way into Tampa Bay’s psyche last year, when the Leafs-Lightning first-round series went to seven games. One team’s exuberance is another’s pop music pariah.

But mercifully, not all goal songs are created equal. While some reside between unnerving and unbearable, others are creative, catchy and endearing, even to opposing fans.

We’ve listened to them all intently (or in some cases, as intently as we could tolerate), and have assembled the following list of what we deem the NHL’s five best and five worst celebratory songs. Creativity was a significant criterion in our rankings, as was sing-a-long value, and indigenous quality (how well a song fits a certain fan base).

Note that the Sabres, Panthers and Capitals use individual songs for each player, sort of like walk-up music in baseball. Our list considers only team goal songs.

The 5 best 5. Blackhawks

Chelsea Dagger by The Fratellis

This mid-1990s punk-rock party tune (which reached No. 5 on the United Kingdom singles chart), has evolved into a transcendent sports anthem used by a number of pro soccer clubs, as well as college and pro hockey teams. They can’t all be wrong. The guitar-driven chorus line (“duh, duh-duh-duh, duh-duh-duh”) is custom-designed for exuberant crowds.

4. Hurricanes

Raise Up by Petey Pablo

Let’s face it: The NHL could use more hip-hop in its assorted soundtracks, and the Hurricanes are way ahead of the curve. This 20-year-old tune especially works because Pablo — a native of Greenville, N.C. — essentially crafted it as an ode to his home state: “North Carolinaaa, c’mon and raise up! Take your shirt off, twist it around your hand...” Fitting on so many levels.

3. Stars

Puck Off by Pantera

Again, we give weight to originality, and this head-banger was crafted specifically for the Stars by iconic Arlington, Texas-based heavy metal band Pantera. A rapid-fire Vinnie Paul drumbeat leads into a chant of “Dallas! ... Stars!” followed by a thrashy, no-frills guitar riff. The fact Pantera’s founding members — Paul and brother “Dimebag” Darrell Abbott — are deceased adds poignance.

2. Rangers

Slapshot by Ray Castoldi

Few goal songs are so universally embraced by the fan base as this one, which is nearing its 30th birthday. Crafted by Ray Castoldi, Madison Square Garden’s musical director and organist, it is brilliant in its simplicity: A brief, churning guitar riff segues to a rapid-fire drumbeat, which leads to the Garden congregation belting out the contagious chorus of “Goooaaaallll!” Mesmerizing.

1. Kraken

Lithium by Nirvana

In a recent poll conducted by The Athletic of the NHL’s top goal songs, this one ranked No. 1. We agree. Face it, this early-1990s grunge classic fits Seattle’s franchise like a flannel shirt. Kurt Cobain’s gritty, guttural “Yeaaaahhhhhh” gets things going, and his chorus line of “I like it...” is followed by the Climate Pledge Arena chanting “Let’s Go Kraken!” Pure nirvana indeed.

Honorable mention Predators

I Like It, I Love It by Tim McGraw; Gold on the Ceiling by The Black Keys

Perfectly indigenous to Nashville’s eclectic music scene. McGraw’s southern-fried chorus line segues seamlessly into a crunchy, catchy rock tune.

Wild

Shout by The Isley Brothers

Hardly an original idea, but 60 years later, this frat-house staple (“You know you make me wannna SHOUT”) still works.

Coyotes

Howlin’ For You by The Black Keys

A bluesy tune, with a guitar lick culled from the Mississippi Delta, that transitions right into a contagious singalong (“duh-duh-duh-DUH-duh, duh-duh-duh-duh-duh)”

And the 5 worst 5. Red Wings

Let’s Go Red Wings by Fred Coury

It pains us to banish this one to our bottom feeders. We’re big fans of 1980s rock band Cinderella, and Coury was the group’s drummer, but this goal song is every bit as vanilla as its title.

4. Blue Jackets

For Those About to Rock by AC/DC

If the Jackets stuck with this bombastic AC/DC anthem all the way through, it might work. It starts with Brian Johnson’s gritty, immortal howl (”For those about to rock ... Fire!!!) and the ensuing sound of a cannon blast followed by the chorus line, “Weeee Saluuute Youuu.” Then it goes totally off the tracks with a bubble-gum pop chorus of “Whoa-oohhh...” Discombobulating. And disappointing.

3. Sharks

Get Ready for This by 2 Unlimited

A synth-heavy, 30-year-old pseudo-rap song that oversaturated the sports landscape long ago. Energetic for sure, and it may have thrust everyone on the dance floor back in the day, but it now should be confined to the sound system at your neighborhood Chuck E. Cheese.

2. Canucks

Don’t You Forget About Me by Simple Minds)

This song works in one — and only one — setting: As the cinematic soundtrack for the 1980s teen-angst masterpiece “The Breakfast Club.”

1. Maple Leafs

You Make My Dreams (Come True) by Hall & Oates

Full disclosure: We just don’t get it. Employing a 40-year-old, keyboard-driven pop tune with a doo-wop undertone as your goal song makes zero sense, unless you’re simply trying to annoy the opposition to no end. In which case, it works brilliantly.

Contact Joey Knight at jknight@tampabay.com. Follow @TBTimes_Bulls.

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