I tried McDonald's grandma McFlurry so you don't have to. Here's my ...

You’re telling me a grandma made this McFlurry?

McDonald’s latest limited-time dessert offering, the “grandma McFlurry,” spun its way into stores on Tuesday. If you’re confused by the the name, you’re not alone. I just ate it and I still don’t really know what it’s in it. While McDonald’s other McFlurry treats have pretty self-explanatory titles — the Oreo McFlurry and M&M McFlurry are classics — naming a McFlurry after the matriarch of the family... requires some explanation.

A press release for the dessert describes it as “delicious syrup and chopped, crunchy candy pieces (like grandma’s favorite treat that she hid in her purse!)” mixed with vanilla soft serve ice cream. I feel like everyone’s grandma had different candies — my Aunt Sis always gave me licorice, where’s my licorice McFlurry? But photos make it clear this dessert is emulating Werther’s Original butterscotch hard candies. It’s fair to call those grandma candies.

Call me a grandma, but I love those butterscotch little discs. So I was excited about this dessert, even if I didn’t quite understand the peg. I’m not saying we shouldn’t appreciate grandma every day of the year, but National Grandparents Day is in September. And I’m pretty sure my grandmother has never had a McFlurry before.

The funniest part about McDonald’s going wide on a new McFlurry campaign is that the machines to make these desserts are routinely “broken.” So often so that they have inspired conspiracy theories and federal investigations. As a fast food expert, my guess is McDonald’s workers simply don’t want to make the labor-intensive dessert. You might hear the same rap if you order a milkshake at a dinner at midnight. Side note, don’t order a milkshake at a dinner at midnight.

So I was relieved when I ordered the grandma McFlurry on Tuesday and was not rebuffed by the woman at the drive-thru window. Not only was the machine working, but the new dessert comes in a special pink cup featuring a McDonald’s logo on a quilt and “xoxo, Grandma” in script. Excellent branding.

But what about the bite? The butterscotch flavoring was present immediately. Your mileage may vary on butterscotch, but I love it. It was borderline overpowering, but it’s pretty hard to make a flavor like butterscotch subtle.

The flavor wasn’t an issue. The texture was. While there were a few amber slivers of butterscotch candy throughout the ice cream, the more present addition was something that felt more like those pie crust pieces that that some ice cream shops use in sundaes and milkshakes to add a pie-like texture. They weren’t quite soft, they weren’t quite crunchy, they were more... chunky. Not super pleasant.

I wish there had simply been more butterscotch candy pieces than pie pieces. Those were delicious! The butterscotch syrup mixed into the ice cream was also very tasty, and present throughout the entire cup.

Is this my favorite McFlurry? Definitely not. More than anything, it makes me wish McDonald’s would simply give us one of the McFlurries they offer at international locations. Canada got a caramel popcorn McFlurry! EuroCanada got a caramel popcorn McFlurry! Europe had a Cadbury Creme Egg McFlurry! We get the grandma McFlurry. Cool.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I’m going to call my grandma. Maybe she wants a McFlurry.

Related coverage:

• I tried Burger King’s Philly melt so you don’t have to. Here’s my review.

• I tried Sonic’s orange Cloudsicle slush float so you don’t have to. Here’s my review.

• I tried Wendy’s orange Dreamsicle Frosty so you don’t have to. Here’s my review.

• I tried Burger King’s candied bacon Whopper so you don’t have to. Here’s my review.

• I tried Taco Bell’s 6 new menu items so you don’t have to. Here’s my review and ranking.

Looking for more New Jersey food coverage? Subscribe to the free Jersey Eats newsletter here!

Our journalism needs your support. Please subscribe today to NJ.com.

Jeremy Schneider may be reached at jschneider@njadvancemedia.com and followed on Twitter at @J_Schneider and on Instagram at @JeremyIsHungryAgain.